I used to think there was a kind of bird that, once born, would keep flying until death. The fact is that the bird hasn't gone anywhere. It was dead from the beginning.
Days Of Being Wild
Me, Myself, And I
Name : The One Age : 1988 Location : In My Living Room No More Height : Shorter Than You Weight : Heavier Than You Religion : Taoism, ?(Dào) Family : Divorced Parents, Younger Sister Birthplace : Mount Elizabeth Hometown : Geylang Lorong 34 Favourite Food : MeePok, KFC, Prawns and Pig Liver
They say 2 things are certain in life - Death, and Taxes.
I've been to several funerals in my short lifetime. The first was the passing of my Great Grandmother.
I was younger then, and I remember it was just days after the new Millenium. I was back from holiday and so I called my family at the airport, only to receive news of her passing by my cousin. I went to Malacca to attend her funeral, and that, was the first time I saw a coffin in real life. Young as I was, I saw a glimpse of what was ahead of me. Aunties and cousins were crying, and it has such a weird and creepy atmosphere to it. Naturally, I was sad of her passing, but I didn't cry.
The second time, was my Grandfather's. It was again, in Malacca. Though older, I was again shocked and taken back at the prospect of a funeral. I didn't cry again, but I was really sad. My Grandfather had played chess with me, bought me Mee Pok, and talked to me when he had time to come to Singapore and visit my Grandmother. Even when I saw with my own eyes my Grandfather's coffin being pushed into that burning chamber of sorts, I didn't cry.
This time, it wasn't someone related to me by blood. He was a friend, and a classmate. Though we never talked much, but we had respect for one another, and we knew each other's existence. The news of his death came as a shock to me, I shouted out 'Fuck!' when my friend broke the news to me. I then took a moment of silence, and I recollected our moments together.
On Saturday, my gang went to his wake. After the 3 bows, I walked towards the coffin and stood beside my friend. In my heart, I said "Take care, friend.", followed by the longest minute of silence. Looking at him, I couldn't believe it was happening, and I just keep telling myself that it was all a bad dream. But it was real, he's gone, forever. I regret that I never get to know him as much as I can.
The death of my friend has the biggest impact on me, because he was someone close to me at the time of his passing. Only the other day did I saw him laughing and joking around, and now, he's just gone.
I knew it was too good to be true. Why am I so stupid? Why am I such a fool? Who am I kidding? You are so pretty you are out of my league.
Still, thanks for the memories.
This may sound un-typical from me, but yours truly just got lost in love. He was so stupid! He actually thinks that someone so pretty would actually fall for him! Haha! I was such a fool and such a joke.
Hopefully, Bangkok can make me forget. See you guys in four.
It's not even about religion in the first place, it's a freaking Chinese tradition to burn burn burn during the Hungry Ghost Festival.
Anyway, it's already dying a slow and steady death. Leave it in peace and it only takes another generation for it to go away. No need for sarcasm at all.
Aug 30, 2007 Don't burn so much hell money - how about fund transfers from the living to the dead? I AM concerned over the poor air quality during the Chinese seventh month.
I understand and respect the fact that a huge proportion of our citizens place importance in the burning of hell money as a form of respect to their ancestors and deities.
However, with the current global emphasis on saving the environment, I see a pressing need to make some suggestions.
In our mortal world, we now have credit cards, cheques and several forms of remittances (SWIFT and telegraphic transfers). I appeal to religious leaders, whose followers practise the burning of hell money, to study the implications of alternative hell fund transfers.
I see these alternatives as a win-win situation for the living and the deceased. The latter stand to receive an infinite amount of hell funds with the mere burning of say, one hell cheque or one hell credit card, thus saving a whole stack of paper from the bonfire, or the religious leaders could run a form of remittance facility. With the technological advances that we now have, I am confident that where there's a will, there's a way.
It is timely to set a good example to our younger generation to practise what we have been preaching to other nations struggling to curb the slash-and-burn method to clear jungles and forests and that is, to reduce, to reuse and to recycle.
while this town’s busy sleeping all the noises died away i walk the streets to stop my weeping ‘cause she'll never change her ways
don't fool yourself she was heartache from the moment that you met her my heart feels so still as i try to find the will to forget her somehow oh i think i've forgotten her now
her love is a rose pale and dying dropping her petals and man i know all full of wine the world before her while I’m sober with no place to go
don't fool yourself she was heartache from the moment that you met her my heart is frozen still as i try to find the will to forget her somehow she's somewhere out there now
oh my tears are falling down as i try to forget the love was a joke from the day that we met all of the words all of her men all of my pain when i think back to when remember her hair as it shone in the sun the smell of the bed when i knew what she'd done tell yourself over and over you wont ever need her again
But don't fool yourself she was heartache from the moment that you met her oh my heart is frozen still as i try to find the will to forget her somehow she's out there somewhere now
oh she was heartache from the day that i first met her my heart is frozen still as i try to find the will to forget you somehow cause i know you're somewhere out there right now
And now my template has went mad and everything looks funny.
Later at night, I'm taking my last examination for the year. The subjec.. I mean module is called Organisational Management. When I first heard of it, I thought I was going to be a General Manager if I ever Aced in it. However, later I thought it was just a module designed to balance the equation (aka Grade Point Average).
For the first time in my PolytechnicYears, I think I'm going to do quite badly for my exams. And by bad I mean 3.0/4.0. For obvious reasons Aeronautical students are so clever that the average is 3.5/4.0. Therefore, I'm not going to be a average student anymore.
However, I don't feel bad/guilty/sad about it. Because I expected it. What with all that fake smile and energy-consuming work at that restaurant in Centrepoint.
I will never work again in the F&B industry if I have a choice. I can't forgive myself when I fake that smile.
When the food is bad, you take the shit. When the service is bad, you take the shit. When the customers aren't flowing, you take the shit.
No wonder my Father always tell me not to follow in his footsteps. He says I should be a robot and carry balls and smile whenever I can.
Still, I have gained a massive amount of experience working in the F&B industry. It let me into the (small) world of Singaporeans who are full of shit. It's very funny and sad at the same time. What's the point of being moneyful when you have no human in you?
I don't know why, but I don't experience this with Ang Mohs at all. They are so appreciative of you serving them, compared to my few fellow Singaporeans who gives me the idea that I owed them in my past life. And most of them are Chinese by the way.
The sad thing about being Chinese is that you get all that backstabbing from your fellow people. It's like an internal conflict due to a lack of common identity and culture where it was destroyed(eradicated) a long time ago. You don't see this with the Malays for example. You see them very proud of their own culture and race, and they treat their own as their own.
And now I finally understand why I don't get served as well as Ang mohs get to in any shops in Singapore. It's all about balancing an equation (again) isn't it? You treat me bad and I treat you bad too.
Singaporeans (where mostly are Chinese) always complain about poor service. They should ask themselves if they deserve good service. But what is good service? There's a river between good service and ridiculous service. Mostly, Singaporeans expect the latter.
Happiness is like the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, the harder you try to grab it, the further it runs from you. Happy are those who seek not happiness for themselves but for those around them. Happiness then will come naturally to them through those whom they have brought happiness to. Such is the irony of life.
Since my blog is dying a slow and steady death, I shall provide my loyal readers(friends) with a thought-provoking quote that provoked me mentally.
Examinations are in front of me. I need to hug the Buddha's leg and unleash my photographic memory.
